The Best Man From The Bayou


free-wedding-42Family, Save your money cause the bells are ringing! Right now it’s starting to sound like a department store Santas’ Elf-helper bell-ringing training session. As time passes, it will sound like the Bell Ringers’ Convention my daughter Carrie and her team in Hospitality Food Services at UWO just hosted. Eventually the excitement will grow even more as the time for celebrating moves closer still. Maybe people will turn and give their head a shake and wonder if they are tuning Big Ben. No, that’s just a little much! You can tune a piano, but I’m sure you never need to tune clock chimes! So, what is the occasion for all this tintinnabulation? Not one, not two, not three but… wait for it now…four upcoming weddings in the family!

I’ve told you my family is big and it is getting bigger.(No, it’s not all the awesome pot-luck diners we enjoy!) I will be gaining four new nieces when they marry the four lucky nephews who have persuaded them to jump into this crazy boat of a family of mine. The Titanic was a “ship” people! The happy couples are Aaron and Andrea, Michael and Raelene, Ryan and Ashley, and Lee and Jess.

As the couples go about the business of choosing their wedding party, which is not an easy task sometimes, I am free to indulge my fantasies through verse. Here is a little bit of goofy rhyming whimsy about the best man who wasn’t. And you definitely won’t be asking me to read something special for you at your wedding now I suppose…. Oh well when the muse calls to write you write.Right?

  A Crockodickle Pickle

You’re really in a pickle if the Purple Crockodickle,

That you’ve chosen as your best man for your wedding in July,

Isn’t happy with the colour that you’ve chosen for tuxedos—

So he gets his snout all out of joint and then begins to cry!

His tears are so prolific that they’re raising the Pacific

And he uses as a handkerchief a groomsman’s new silk tie!

He doesn’t like his cummerbund— “Too snug around the waist!”

He can’t be seen in green, you know— or he “will be disgraced!”

Those patent leather shoes, you know “must be too tightly laced!”

And your pocket watch on silver chain he somehow has misplaced!

When you’re all on pins and needles while you’re trying on tuxedos

And the Crockodickle wheedles and he whines to get his way,

Just don’t say “Get lost Mr.” ’til you’ve thought about his sister,

And the “CROCKODICKLE TWISTER!!” things are likely to become.

She might go tell their mother, ’cause you know she loves her brother.

And there’s nothing more voracious than a Crockodickle’s mum!

Hey! I’m curious— how did you and the bride first meet anyway?

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